Why not come with me on a trip down memory lane?
It’s July 2009, and I’m at my first RWA conference. Now, for those of you who have never been to RWA nationals, let’s just say, these conferences are incredibly overwhelming. When you’re not squeeing because you happen to be sitting next to Stephanie Laurens or flipping out because you are *this* close to Susan Elizabeth Phillips, you’re basically just trying not to look like you have no idea what you’re doing. Which, of course, you don’t.
But, if you’re lucky, while you’re standing in the corner at a party wondering who you’re going to talk to, you meet Sabrina Darby, author of the hot hot HOT On These Silken Sheets. Who, besides being awesome, is also at RWA for the first time. And who is a kindred spirit.
Sabrina and I became fast friends, and so it’s no surprise that I asked her to share a list of Nine Rules on the blog. I’m so happy that she had the time to come over to celebrate the launch of Nine Rules…!
Nine (Annotated) Rules for conducting an assignation during “The Season.”
1) Any potted plant or shrubbery is coverage enough for stealing a kiss––or more. Keep in mind that nearly any greenery will do, be it the thinnest fern or a whole hedge; what really matters is the intent of privacy.
2) The draperies in dimly lit alcoves are there for a purpose, make use of them. No, no, I am not recommending having an affair behind a drapery! I merely advise you that if you are trying to avoid an undesirable suitor, and hide behind a drapery to do so, you will likely stumble upon a suitor much more to your liking.
3) No matter how many people are on the terrace, there is always a corner dark enough for an embrace. This is always true. However, you must ensure that you are not seen on the way to this dark corner.
4) For even more privacy, decamp to the library.
5) If the library is already taken, try the study.
6) If the study is already taken, try the linen closet. A word of warning: If you are a young lady engaging in an improper embrace with a young man who has no intention of marrying ever, the library and study may seem more private but in truth are the first places any self-respecting guardian will look for you. If your intention is to force your young man’s hand, by all means continue on. If you wish to remain undiscovered for a few more chapters, then I suggest the potted plant in the corner of the ballroom. Or, if your tastes run to absolutely scandalous, I recommend seeking the anonymity of a private club catering to sexual indiscretion. Be aware that no matter how well you disguise your identity, your true love will recognize you.
7) Never underestimate the power of alcohol. If the punch at the ball is too weak, there is always a stash of brandy or whisky to be found. This bounty is usually found in the study or library. However, see the above warning with regards to privacy.
8) A billiards table has more than one purpose. If this is not immediately obvious to you, I recommend asking the man with whom you intend to meet. Any rake worth his tightly tailored trousers will know.
9) Footmen and maids can and should be bribed. Do be certain that your bribe is the highest.
Contest time!
I’ve got one copy of the AMAZING On These Silken Sheets for one lucky commenter…to enter, comment with one thing that makes a heroine perfect in your view. Don’t forget to leave your email address so I can reach you if you win! I’ll choose the winner on Thursday morning!
And stay tuned for the rest of the month–and a dozen more Authors Rule(s) posts from an awesome range of authors! To read more of Authors Rule(s), please click here!
April 6th, 2010 at 3:49 pm
How fun! What about in a carriage? Preferably moving.
No need to enter me in the contest as I've already read and enjoyed "Silken Sheets".
April 6th, 2010 at 3:59 pm
So am I supposed to ask the rake what the table itself is useful for or the balls? ;>
I'm sure he'll have a use for either… or I'm an imaginative gal.
Excellent post!
April Morelock
April 6th, 2010 at 4:12 pm
Sarah I hope you have a fantastic release! I'm really looking forward to reading the book – Sabrina has told me great things about it! No need to enter me in the contest, unless you can exchange your book for Sabrina's, as I've already read, and loved, OTSS! :)
Loved these 9 rules. :)
April 6th, 2010 at 5:41 pm
If you're fortunate enough to find a potted plant in/near the dark corner of the terrace you're golden!
Too funny. :)
April 6th, 2010 at 5:59 pm
Please don't enter me either; I loved Sabrina's book! As for a perfect heroine, smart and funny top my list. They make for far more interesting heroines than the beautiful but vapid ;)
–Fedora
April 6th, 2010 at 6:23 pm
The perfect heroine, would be someone who has integrity, is passionate about things, intelligent, witty, kind, loyal, strong willed, tender and compassionate. And someone who is willing to listen. I hate when heroines are purposefully obtuse.
I haven't read Sabrina Darby yet, but I just got your book yesterday and can't wait to start it!!! :)
April 6th, 2010 at 7:52 pm
My favorite heroines are always the ones who break the rules (preferably with hilarious results). I think that's why I love to read and write Regencies — it's such a challenge to come up with fresh, believable ways for women to act outside the strict moral code, but when it's done well, it's so wonderful to read.
Congrats on your release – I'm looking forward to reading it!
April 6th, 2010 at 9:03 pm
I agree with Fedora. A perfect heroine should be smart and have a sense of humor.
janie1215 AT excite DOT com
April 6th, 2010 at 9:46 pm
My favorite heroines are the ones who have a goal and a plan to achieve that goal.
JOYE
JWIsley(at)aol(dot)com
April 6th, 2010 at 10:27 pm
A perfect heroine has to be strong, smart, funny and a soft side.
spav05(at)gmail(dot)com
April 7th, 2010 at 2:21 am
Hilarious list! I love the billiards table rule :D The perfect heroine in my view is intelligent, sarcastic, feisty, and funny, and who falls for a guy totally who's totally wrong for her (but actually perfect).
phillipsrero(at)gmail(dot)com
April 7th, 2010 at 3:08 am
Love the list! Congrats on the release, it sounds great!
To me, the perfect heroine is one with many flaws. Flaws that give her character, someone real that we can relate to, someone with depth to draw a hunky hero :)
April 7th, 2010 at 4:33 am
This was hilarious, especially #6.
The perfect heroine has to have a good sense of humor. If she can't make me laugh, I find it hard to root for her.
April 7th, 2010 at 5:28 am
A perfect heroine has to be strong, but know when to ask for help. No one loves a heroine that's too stubborn to live.
April 8th, 2010 at 2:33 am
I love reading about heroines who have a great sense of humor and don't get wrapped up too much into what the Ton thinks.
April 8th, 2010 at 2:33 am
Oops! I thought that by typing my gmail account that you'd see it.
lvsgund at gmail dot com